Rape And Sexual Abuse Support Centre
Guildford, Surrey

RASASC Advice Guidelines

The Rape And Sexual Abuse Support Centre (RASASC) is a UK Registered Charity based in Guildford, Surrey. As well as providing Helpline and counselling services we also offer various advice guidelines as part of our constituted aims to relieve the distress of anyone who has suffered sexual assault and educate the public in the problems of sexual abuse.

Surviving Male Rape / Sexual Abuse

MALE RAPE IS ABOUT DOMINATION. It is not about sex; it is about power - the power to humiliate, to control. In everyday life, men and boys can suffer appalling sexual assaults. And very often, male victims do not ask for help but try instead to keep the assault secret because of a feeling of shame; a feeling that, culturally, they are expected to present a ‘strong’ external image, no matter how much they are suffering inside.

SOCIETY expects men to be strong enough to look after themselves. This can lead to conflicting feelings about what has happened and what to do about it, adding further turmoil to a victim's anxieties of whether to report such an attack - anxieties about whether the Police are likely to respond sympathetically; how doctors are likely to react; what to do about the risk of sexually transmitted disease; what will be the response of family and friends if they find out about the assault. All of these worries represent an extra burden.

CONFUSION, DEPRESSION, ISOLATION are all natural reactions. Often victims seek to blank out their anxieties by using drink and drugs as a solution to their feelings of powerlessness and humiliation. Common problems resulting among male victims are relationship difficulties, alcohol/drug misuse, low self-esteem, anger and/or depression, and isolation.

Our Telephone Helpline receives calls from men of all ages, sexualities, races and backgrounds. The chance to talk about your experiences can be a positive start towards making sense of what happened and taking a step towards rebuilding your life.

IT TAKES COURAGE to make the first move, to pick up the telephone and begin to talk about what has happened. At RASASC we understand that. One of our earliest callers said “This is the hardest phone call I have ever made in my life”. A client coming to his first counselling session described his own difficulty: “I was so tempted to go down the pub first but I got myself here and I’m gonna have the biggest bloody drink when I get out of here tonight”. He had found the courage to say at last “My childhood was stolen from me by a paedophile”.

The opportunity to talk about your experiences can be the key to properly understanding what has happened and the first step to moving forward again in your life. You don’t have to suffer in silence! We are an organisation that cares about providing support, and understands the destructive impact of rape and abuse on the lives of the men that experience such suffering, and knows about the shame and the guilt and the way these crimes diminish a man’s confidence and self respect.

ONCE YOU’VE TAKEN THAT FIRST STEP and talked about your experience you might feel a great sense of relief - as though you’ve put down a burden that you've been carrying all on your own.

If you are a member of the public and have found our advice guidelines useful or comforting, please consider making a donation to support the work we do. Every contribution helps a victim to become a survivor.